"here we are and here we will stay"

Less than four days until I leave for my grand adventure to Guyana. As I finished filling out some insurance claims forms, I came across a quote from President Brigham Young I had carefully copied one day months ago during church. It's a beautiful quote and I felt it a shame to simply place it back inside my big notebook, to be forgotten about for a few more months. So I will share it here that not only may I have more opportunity to reflect on and remember it, but so that you (whoever you are) may enjoy it as well.

If you are LDS, you already know about Brother Brigham. If you are not, I will tell you the basics-- he was the second prophet after Christ's church was restored to this Earth. He is famous for leading the Mormons from Nauvoo, IL to middle-of-nowhere Utah. He was a pivotal person in the movement of people to the West. When he and the Saints first arrived in the Salt Lake Valley in 1847, President Young declared, "this is the right place".

Life was hard in newly settled Utah, and some of the Saints wanted to journey out and find gold. What did Brigham tell them? (enter my awesome quote)

God has appointed this place for the gathering of his saints... Those who stop here and are faithful to God and his people will make more money and get richer than you that run after the god of this world.... We have been kicked out of the frying pan into the fire, out of the fire into the middle of the floor, and here we are and here we will stay. God has shown me that this is the spot to locate his people, and here is where they will prosper; he will temper the elements for the good of his Saints; he will rebuke the frost and the sterility of the soil, and the land shall become fruitful. Brethren, go to now, and plant out your fruit seeds. . . .

What does this mean to me? A lot. During the summer of 2010 I was praying about whether or not I should withdraw from BYU-Idaho and come home that fall. I fasted about it and went to the temple. On the way to the temple I passed by a fellow who was on the phone, reading his scriptures out loud. I heard him say, "go down into the valley which is northward". I was so astonished at this (for those of you who don't know, my home in Washington is in a valley-area... and WA is north of Idaho) that I turned around and asked the young man where he had been reading. He answered "Ether 1", the last two verses of which read

...thou shalt go at the head of them down into the valley which is northward. And there will I meet thee, and I will go before thee into a land which is choice above all the lands of the earth. And there will I bless thee and thy seed, and raise up unto me of thy seed, and of the seed of thy brother, and they who shall go with thee, a great nation. And there shall be none greater than the nation which I will raise up unto me of thy seed, upon all the face of the earth. And thus I will do unto thee because this long time ye have cried unto me.

Jesus Christ has a history of bringing his people away from their comfort zones into a land prepared for them. He led the Israelites out of bondage in Egypt; he led Lehi and his family out of Jerusalem before it was destroyed; and in the above scripture, He is preparing the prophet and his brother, Jared, to lead their families and friends to the promised land. He led Christopher Columbus to discover the Americas! Christ prepares a beautiful land for his people to prosper, multiply, raise children, and grow in freedom as they worship Him. Was not the United States a nation formed by the hand of God?

Our great Captain (or Pilot) does not reserve His hand for mass exoduses. Instead, I believe that He guides us each to our own promised land- sometimes literally, sometimes figuratively. He literally led me back home to Washington and I believe "here [I am] and here [I] will stay" (for now... and except for my upcoming trip to Guyana ;) ). And what has He promised me if I am faithful to God, his people, and go to now and plant my seeds? He promises me that He will temper the elements for my good, He will rebuke the frost and sterility of the soil, and this land will become fruitful for me.

I know this is true and I know that this is what He is doing in my life now. I know that He is providing me rich opportunities now- right where I am in my life!-- to do and learn things to not only serve His children, but to also be prepared to be a mother to some of His sacred little ones who so desire to come to Earth and gain bodies. I'm excited (and a bit intimidated haha) to be a mother someday and I am grateful for the opportunities I am given now at my young age to build a foundation for not only my life, but for my future family and my children.

1. An account of the awesome life of Brigham Young is found here and here.
2. "Our Very Survival", a neat talk on prophets given by Elder Kevin R Duncan.
3. The speech, "These Noble Pioneers" (by the prophet Gordon B Hinckley) where this quote and the story surrounding it can be found in entirety.
4. "Christopher Columbus: Inspired Seaman". Written for children.

my camera. note to self.

why do i always feel embarrassed when professionals ask me what kind of camera i have? honestly, i love taking pictures, i like making money for it when i can, my camera was a very generous gift from my grandfather, photoshop was something my father was blessedly in the position to give, and someday (hopefully soon) i'll be able to start saving up for a nice canon or nikon body + lens, but in the meantime i'm totally privileged to associate with and learn from wonderful photographers!

so i need not have an inferiority complex when asked what kind of camera i have. so what if my camera isn't a DSLR, or i don't have a really cool f/1.8 lens (drool), or a telefoto lens (again, drool)? at very little cost to myself, i have the tools i need to develop photographic skill and that, in the long run, is extraordinarily valuable.

i feel like i'm fighting a cultural thing that teaches if you don't have the latest and greatest toy (piece of technology or whatever that "toy" be), you can't succeed. you must be competitive on every level as soon as possible and (here's the real kicker), if you have to go into debt for this, then do it.

i'm okay with taking the risk of calculated debt. that's what i'm doing for this guyana trip. but as things stand, i can't afford expensive camera equipment, and i have more important things to save up for in the meantime. so for now, i will drool over my friends' and peers' cameras and enjoy the wonderful camera and tools i have and use them to develop the best photography skill i can.

that is my reply to the "i should"s i have inside my brain that needed silencing.

the end.

this is crazy!

"i gotta share this on facebook, this is some crazy stuff!"

- what i would say about what i learn about occupy wallstreet, occupy seattle, etc.

- what my sister says about the newly discovered cyclops shark

that's right. i'm a sage.

so the boy she likes happens to like her. he also happens to play city of heroes, which is the online RPG that my dad and step-brother recently got her into. so it's their day off of school and she's complaining that he won't stop texting her to get online and play with him and she keeps telling him that she can't get on the computer right now. so finally she told him that he needs to level up to play with her. he responded by asking when she'd be able to play.

my advice? text him back and say,

"if you don't stop texting me, you will never level up"

mission accomplishment before personal safety

My brother had his first ever migraine last night. He said "I'd rather get kicked in the nuts."

I got to advise him a lot on what's good and bad for migraines and what they actually are. That was fun. I always like talking about the pathophysiology of migraines.

He even made a comment about having more sympathy for me now. My response of "yeah, I felt that for about 2 years straight" was the closest I came to saying "I told you so". He was very nice about it and laughed. It's nice to have someone in my home now who has had a migraine. He agreed that you truly don't understand what they're like until you've had one. Now, he had whopper of a migraine which involved a night long of dry heaving, but I'm grateful he understands now. It's encouraging to me.

He was a little worried about them coming frequently, but he doesn't have a family history of migraines so I think he's pretty safe. he seemed relieved to hear that.

Part of my routine when I get a migraine is to stop. Just stop. And take care of myself, so when I'm feeling better I can get back into things full swing. This is mostly bred out of self-preservation-- I tried the keep-going-with-a-migraine thing and the result was constant migraines for a long time, failed classes, lost weight (muscle mass, unfortunately), couldn't eat much.... you get the picture. So to avoid total incapacitation, I generally don't "push through" a migraine. Rob is now sitting and reading a book, per non-doctor's orders, but that was only after doing some work on chores. I told him he really should sit down and take care of himself before doing all that so it didn't get worse, but the movement seemed to help the muscular component and he proclaimed the USMC mindset of "mission accomplishment before personal safety". I admire that, and so long as he doesn't get recurrent migraines, that will work in his favor (and given his family history, I don't think he's likely to have recurrent migraines).

I don't think that mindset would work for me, but then again, maybe it would? I think the key is in following the prophetic counsel of King Benjamin,

And see that all these things are done in wisdom and order; for it is not requisite that a man should run faster than he has strength. And again, it is expedient that he should be diligent, that thereby he might win the prize; therefore, all things must be done in order. (Mosiah 4:27)

So, don't run faster than you have strength. But use the strength you have-- discover it, increase it, and diligently pursue your dreams.