those holes in my head

This is a picture of my face from the front.  You know, if you had CT-vision and were looking at me head-on this is what you would see.  I will explain some of what you are seeing.

The two big black holes in the middle are my maxillary sinuses.  You can see pointing to these sinuses a green captain saying "pus (yay!)".  The pus is from inflammation in my sinuses & nose and mucus not being able to drain.  My understanding is that the mucus turns into pus under these conditions.  (Don't take my word as law.)

Do you see the green captain that says "more pus?" ?  The arrows are pointing to my ethmoid sinuses.  I'm wondering if the gray splotches (not the lines- those are just dividing walls between sinuses) are pus, too.

Ah, "deviated septum".  That is one of the key features in this CT.  Notice the dotted line marked "A" by the radiologist?  That's the line my septum (the white line the green arrow points to) should follow, but doesn't.  Thus why my septum is called a deviated one.  See the blue circled part labeled "bad"?  I believe that is where my Dr said the septum is making contact with the bone or the turbinates or something.  Anyways, it's not supposed to happen and when it does it can cause pain along the trigeminal nerve pathway.

Which brings us to the trigeminal nerve.  I drew it for you since it doesn't show up on CTs.  As you can see, the trigeminal nerve has 3 major branches- one to the temples/sides of the forehead, one to the nasal area, and one to the jaw.  This nerve is a major player in migraine headaches and you can see why sinus or jaw problems might cause migraines, or why a migraine may involve facial pain and/or jaw stiffness.  This is because if something painful happens at one branch of the trigeminal nerve, the pain messages can get sent all along the other branches.  Youch!  This is the reason why my Dr thinks my sinus problems might be the problem that is sending my migraines and headaches over the top.

One last note, look at the yellow arrows labeled "R&L nasal passages".  You can see how the L nasal passage is half the size of the R one.  This is the reason why my mucus can't drain and also the reason why I get short of breath more easily when I'm breathing through my L nostril.

The abnormal size of my L nasal passage, plus all the collected mucus/pus in my sinuses aggravates my asthma and sleep apnea.  Since this picture (CT scan) was taken, I believe the pus in my R maxillary sinus has decreased... I wouldn't be surprised if it had disappeared.  This is because the magic Dr treated me for sinus infection and the R side of my face can actually drain, whereas the L still has problems.

I will note an interesting Cassanndre-Sinus-Migraine factoid: I can tell if a particular migraine is triggered by sinus problems because the pain is localized to the L side of my head (the side to which my septum deviates).

Fascinating, eh?

For a real lesson on sinus anatomy, see the American Rhinologic Society here.


UPDATE:  on account of the crazy snow storm which hit the seattle area, my surgery on the 19th was cancelled.  it is now scheduled for weds, feb 1st.  :)

have any pennies for my thoughts?

So, I have a few partially-thought-out posts either in the "drafts" category of this blog or still in my head...  I'm a bit surprised at myself for actually blogging often enough to have a backlog of blog posts.  Who'da thunk it?  (Maybe you, but certainly not me.)
Anyways, now is not the time I am going to address those.  Now is the time I'm just going to talk about me as of late and some things on my mind.  The three things that have been on my mind the most (in no particular order), are boys, finances, work, and my health.


Guys
I won't say much on this blog about guys (unless it's a scripturally based post like the recent "every girl's dream man"), but I will say that I like guys who know how to treat girls.  I have a few new guy friends whom I really appreciate because they are kind to me- not just kinda kind, but thoughtful and go out of their way to be thoughtful.  I appreciate this.  I also appreciate receiving genuine compliments.  I could go on and on about so many different thoughts about guys but unless you're my mom, my counselor, or one of my best friends you probably won't hear it.  I hope you're not too disappointed ;)


Finances
In the past couple of months I haven't been able to work much for various reasons and that has been frustrating for me, my checkbook, and my psyche.  However, I have come to be grateful for my dearth of income for it has required me to budget and track my spending better and also rely on the Lord more.  He is totally providing for me- I truly do have sufficient to meet my needs!  I even have sufficient for a 'want' here or there, such as buying Christmas presents for family last month, going dancing tonight with a friend, and through the generous birthday and  Christmas presents of family, I am getting a new camera on Monday!  (A real Canon DSLR.... I am stoked!  I could go on and on about the camera but I'll save that for another time.)
I talked to my grandma on the phone today (okay, it's 2am, so technically yesterday) and commented to her that I'm really grateful for how tight my financial situation has become because it is really helping me to develop the habits I need to be financially responsible for the rest of my life.  I talked about how long-term, I feel that it's more important to develop these skills than it is for me to work every day and make good money (such that I don't need to budget as much and I forget to rely on the Lord for my very bread and water).  I have seen people have financial strain and I want to learn not only how to avoid it, but how to make the best of it.  I also want to become an expert budget-er so that someday when I have kids I can start teaching them about it young.
I find it almost odd that I feel so grateful to be flirting with the line of being broke.  I never thought I would feel that way about, well, having a lack of money haha.  Money can't buy happiness- it's a well-known cliche, true, but it's well-known for good reason: it is so true.  Happiness, or self-satisfaction and peace, comes from having agency: the ability to choose.  When we manage our money poorly, it controls us and we become bound and lose many options.  When manage our money wiself- whether we are rich or poor- we are exercising agency or power over it, and so we are in control and able to continously generate and chose options for action.
On ProvidentLiving.org's Financial Self-Reliance page, there is an awesome quote from President N. Eldon Tanner:

Those who structure their standard of living to allow a little surplus, control their circumstances. Those who spend a little more than they earn are controlled by their circumstances. They are in bondage”

Work
I like being a paraeducator and I really enjoy working in special ed.  It's also fun, as a substitute, to go around the district and see how different teachers run their different classrooms.  Very educational for me and helpful in generating ideas for how I want to teach my own kids someday.
But the scheduling of a substitute sucks and is something that has ended up being really hard for me.  It used to be good because I would work work work and then get sick and take time off no problem.  And then I went to school and was able to cut way back my working hours so I could study... no problem (except a decrease in income, obviously).  But now it's to the point for me that I don't really like my job.  I mean, I often enjoy it when I get to wherever I'm subbing, but at the same time, I don't come home from work with a sense of satisfaction that I made a difference and stretched myself today.  Usually I come home with a sense of satisfaction from simply knowing that I made money today.  I don't want that out of a job and to be honest, it is not enough to get me out of bed in the morning when I don't feel well.  This may be a character flaw in me, but it is the way I am (at least for the time being).  Last summer I made a "bucket list" of sorts and on that list is "work in an emergency room".  I think I might just pursue that.  It appeals to me, I think would really enjoy the job, learn and see a lot, make decent money, and be doing something that will be good for whatever career in medicine/health care I decide to go into.  I've still got more praying to do about it, but at this point I'm thinking I'll start pursuing it after I have recovered from my upcoming surgery.
Which brings me to...


Health
I have endoscopic sinus surgery scheduled for Thursday the 19th.  My surgeon is going to fix my deviated septum and open up my sinuses a bit more.  I am hoping that this will help cure my sleep apnea, improve my asthma, allow my sinuses to drain and therefore get rid of my chronic sinus infection, improve my migraines, and maybe even alleviate my daily headache.  I'm not expecting it to fix everything or even fix any one thing all the way, but I believe (and my awesome asthma & allergy Dr believes as well) that fixing my deviated septum will improve a lot of things for me.  Thus far I have just been excited for the surgery and interested in the anatomy of it all.
But now I'm getting a bit more nervous.  I'm nervous about the migraine that I will assuredly get from the surgery.  I'm nervous about taking painkillers and getting a horrible rebound migraine like I did last February (2010) when I had my wisdom teeth removed.  I was on painkillers for a week and then as soon as I got off of them I had a migraine essentially for a week straight.  It was miserable.  I stayed in bed pretty much every day all day and read, watched TV on my laptop, and photoshopped.  Anytime I got out of bed and stood up or moved around for more than a couple minutes, my migraine would return with an eager vengeance...  The week after this constant migraine I was better, but still recovering from the physical and mental toll a migriane like that takes on a person.  I essentially ended up needing a full month to recover before I could go back to working full-time.  It sucked.
I'm worried that will happen again.  Okay, say it does, what's the worst case scenario?  I essentially have no paycheck for the month of February.  Okay.  That wouldn't be fun, but I believe this surgery is needed at tis time in my life and the Lord will take care of me.  The lack of work may mean that some bills don't get paid or debts paid off and I don't have money to go to school in the spring, but I'll be back to work eventually and it'll be okay.
I'm also just a bit nervous about the pain itself.  Normally I'm not too worried about pain... I don't know.  Maybe that's not true.  One thing I'm worried about is the fact that I'll have to sinus rinses after the surgery.  The one time I tried doing a sinus rinse (last fall... september I think) I ended up with a migraine so horrible that I had a friend take me to urgent care.  This was the second time ever in my history of migraines that I have been taken to urgent care to be treated for one.  But it just hurt so badly and there was nothing I could do and I started panicking because of how surprising, strong and persistant the pain was.  My awesome asthma & allergy Dr. explaind to me that this probably happened because of my deviated septum- the migraine was localised to that side of my face and it was probably triggered by my trigeminal nerve flipping out over the water I was attempting to force through my sinuses (again- couldn't drain properly or even enter properly via the left nostril due to that deviation).  So hopefully with the deviated septum fixed i won't have a problem with sinus rinses.  I'm really hoping that's the case cuz I'm trying not to be nervous about all of this...
Okay, so my sleep schedule is way off.  Whether or not I use my CPAP I seem to be waking up after only a few hours of sleep.  It used to be I'd wake up after 5hrs with the CPAP and be good to go for the day... now I'm waking up after 3 or 4 with or without it and am not good to go for the day.  What the heck?  For example I started writing this post at 0130 or something like that.  I didn't fall asleep probably till about 3... it's now 0655 and I've been up for maybe an hour now- can't get back to sleep.  I wonder if those chocolate truffles sitting on the counter which I couldn't resist when I got home around midnight have something to do with it...

and that brings us to a subcategory under health...  Sugar.  Which I am going to give it's own post because it deserves that.
Stay tuned.

the seedy underbelly of the relief society

I am expecting that most of you reading this blog are Mormon and are familiar not only with our various organizations, but also with our culture (which is at times quite seperate from our religion, ie: jello with pears, carrots, or other add-ins is not actually doctrine, and some Mormons even drink Dr Pepper, though gross caffeine intake is advised against).
What is the Relief Society?  to quote Mormon.org:

The Relief Society is the oldest and largest women's organization in the world. Relief Society was established in 1842 for women 18 years of age and older. Its purpose is to build faith and personal righteousness, strengthen families and homes, and help those in need.

So I attend a ward or congregation for young single adults (also known as YSA's) .  It consists of a bunch of unmarried adults ranging in age from 18-31.  Every ward has a Relief Society- each individual relief society being a part of the worldwide organization.  As you can imagine, there is some mystique to this organization in a YSA ward.... because it consists of a bunch of single sisters in their 20's (mwahaha).  So every once in a while when we have an activity, gentlemen friends of mine ask, "what do you guys do at those activities anyways?  Gossip?  Cook?  Sew?  Plan to take over the world?"

Well.... I can't tell you about all relief societies, but ours is pretty good at not gossiping, I think.  When we talk about others I've always heard it be with affection.  We've done some sewing and cooking before, among other things.  Take over the world?  Not usually discussed.

Unless you happen to have what we might call an "unofficial" Relief Society activity.  First, what makes it a relief society activity?  The fact that we're meeting at the relief society president's house and she's invited all of the sisters.  What makes it unofficial?  Pretty much it comes down to not having an opening prayer and maybe even watching a PG-13 movie.

So what did we do yesterday?  We had various forms of holiday candy and chocolate, as well as lemonade and popcorn.  Sisters brought movies and we selected Bride and Prejudice.  Pretty kosher Mormon-girl activity, right?  Yep.  So what happens after the movie?  I'm really not sure how to describe it all, so perhaps I will just share some of the things I learned last night.

• dark meat is mostly anaerobic muscle- used for shorter bursts of activity
• white meat is mostly aerobic muscle- used for sustained activity
• 4/5 ladies present at this activity prefer white meat to dark
• a long distance runner would have more white meat on his bones, while a sprinter would have more dark meat
• which men in our ward are long distance runners
• the location of the nearest dump

There was also a discussion on guys that one of the sisters has made cry.  Now that I recall, she also described how it happened, what tools she used, and the way she angled these tools up into this man's face...  There's a perfectly reasonable explanation for all of this, I promise.

Oh, and by no means did I come home from this lovely event borrowing a book entitled, How to be a Villain.  And this book that I did not carry home did not at all contain a mad-libs styled format for creating evil plans.

But if I had come home with such a book, and perhaps shared it with my siblings, the following would be the result.

stage one

To begin, you must first seduce and incinerate Mick Jagger.  This will cause the world to slaughter a sacred calf to the Force and look bewildered and paralyzed by your arrival.  Who is this criminal mastermind that is the destroyer of all things good and nice?  Where did they come from?  And why do they look so good in another person's skin?

stage two

Next, you must vaporize the internet.  This will all be done from your hidden, ancient tomb, a mysterious place of unrivaled dark glory.  Upon seeing this, the world will fall into a catatonic trance, as countless hordes of undead ninjas and demented corporate clowns hasten to do your every bidding.

stage three

Finally, you must unleash the secret Doomsday Machine, bringing about the Antichrist.  Your name shall become synonymous with fuzzy bunnies, and no man will ever again dare to take your lunch money.  Everyone will bow before your unmatched physical prowess, and the world will have no choice but to restore your credit rating.

I promise- Mormonism is not a cult (truly! go read the link!).

still raising money for Guyana...

Okay, so I have been incredibly blessed by friends and family and so far have $1625 raised to help cover the expenses of my Guyana trip.  I actually raised more than that, but about $500 went to cover preparatory expenses of the trip (supplies, clothing, some medical things, etc.-- expenses which I thankfully will not have next time I travel out of the country!).  I have $875 left to fundraise.  Again, worst case scenario is that I pay it off on my own over the next few months, but to be honest, things are tight (I know- such a surprise in this economy!) and I actually have surgery scheduled for the middle of next month, the recovery of which I expect to keep me from work for 2-4 weeks.
So that's my situation.  I would absolutely LOVE it if people donated, but I would also be terribly pleased if anyone wanted to purchase services or goods, which I will list below.  All prices are minimum, but you are welcome to pay me more!  ;)

• housework- with my wonderful OCD skills~ $15/hour ($50 for 5 hours)
• tutoring- with my excellent teaching skills.  I specialize in working with kids with disabilities, but am also good with other subjects up through high school level (and some college level) as well.~ $20/hour
• photography for you, your family, your pets~ from $70 (see list of services at my photography blog here)
• 8x10 prints- floral, tropical, temples, and more (link to come)~ $20 each, 5 for $50, 10 for $90
• professional editing or restoration of photos you already have~ $15 each
• babysitting~ $12/hour
• massage with doTERRA oils~ $25 for one half hour
• caregiving (I am a trained caregiver and can assist with housecleaning, basic medical attention, home physical therapy exercises (as prescribed by a PT), transportation for errands/doctor appointments, and rearranging the home for greater accessibility for the disabled.  I am able to assist bedridden patients and wheelcheer-bound patients.) ~$15/hour, $100 for 8-hour day, $150 for 12-hour shift [+ potential cost of gas]
• anything else you can think of!

Now, my Ve'ahavta fundraising site has been taken down, so I have a new way to fund raise- it goes directly to my paypal account, from where I will send it directly to Ve'ahavta (minus 10% for tithing if it is in exchange for a product or services).

One last note- if you are not able to help financially but would like to help, spread the word to your friends!  If you know of anyone who would be willing to donate or could use some of my services, please send them my way!  Also, if some of the prices above are more than you could afford, contact me anyways and we can work something out.  Anything helps.  My email is cassanndre[at]gmail[dot]com.  (I love my name.  Thank you Mom and Dad.)

samples of photos for sale!  check my picasa web albums for more!  (i add more photos frequently)

every girl's dream man

 One day when I was in high school I sat next to the amazing Kaitlyn Shea in church.  As she flipped through her scriptures, I noticed a page with a heart on the upper right hand margin.  That intrigued me and and so I asked her about it.  She told me it was a passage describing the character of Captain Moroni- the kind of man she wants to marry some day.  This intrigued me and so I read the following underlined passages from chapter 48 of the book of Alma:

...and thus he was preparing to support their liberty, their lands, their wives, and their children, and their peace, and that they might live unto the Lord their God, and that they might maintain that which was called by the their enemies the cause of Christians.
And Moroni was a strong and a mighty man; he was a man of a perfect understanding; yea, a man that did not delight in bloodshed; a man whose soul did joy in the liberty and the freedom of his country, and his brethren from bondage and slavery; Yea, a man whose heart did swell with thanksgiving to his God, for the many privileges and blessings which he bestowed upon his people; a man who did labor exceedingly for hte welfare and safety of his people.  Yea and he was a man who was firm in the faith of Christ, and he had sworn with an oath to defend his people, his rights, and his country, and his religion, even to the loss of his blood.
Now the Nephites were taught to defend themselves against their enemies, even to the shedding of blood if it were necessary yea, and they were also taught never to give an offense, yea, and never to raise the sword except it were against an enemy, except it were to preserve their lives.
And this was their faith, that by so doing God would prosper them in the land, or in other words, if they were faithful in keeping the commandments of God that he would prosper them in the land; yea, warn them to flee or to prepare for war, according to their danger;  And also, that God would make it known unto them whither they should go to defend themselves against their enemies, and by so doing, the Lord would deliver them; and this was the faith of Moroni, and his heart did glory in it; not in the shedding of blood but in doing good, in preserving his people, yea, in keeping the commandments of God, yea, and resisting iniquity.
Yea, verily, verily, I say unto you, if all men had been, and were, and ever would be, like unto Moroni, behold the very powers of hell would have been shaken forever; yea, the devil would never have power over the hearts of the children of men.

 Yeah, not cool at all.  Nor impressive.  Nor awesome.  Definitely doesn't sound like the kind of guy that would make a girl go weak in the knees.  Nuh uh.  Let's go over the listed character traits, shall we?

• an effective and inspiring leader and organizer
• patriot- believed in defending liberty, land, family, peace, and the right to worship as one pleases; his "soul did joy in liberty and freedom of his people"; "had sworn with an oath to defend his people, [rights, country, and religion]
• a strong and mighty man
• wise, educated- "a man of perfect understanding"
• peaceful- "did not delight in bloodshed", believed in never raising the sword except in defense
• grateful- "heart 
• hardworking- "labor exceedingly for the welfare of his people"
• faithful, valiant- "firm in the faith of Christ"
• trusted that his obedience would result in God blessing & delivering him
• believed in obedience, doing good, defending his people
• resisted iniquity

Sounds good to me!
Now in verse 18 there is something interesting:

Behold, he was a man like unto Ammon, the son of Mosiah, yea, and even the other sons of Mosiah, yea, and also Alma and his sons, for they were all men of God.

Who were the sons of Mosiah- these men that the magnificent Captain Moroni is compared to?

Well, when we are first introduced to them they were the "very vilest of sinners" (Mosiah 28:4).  Now that's quite a thing to be called- they weren't just plane vile, very vile, or sinners.  Nor are they referred to simply as "the vilest of sinners", but rather the "very vilest of sinners".  That's not just a superlative... it's like a super superlative! Interestingly, the definition of superlative is "of the highest quality or degree". So effectively we could say that the sons of Mosiah were sinners of the highest degree.  Yikes!

Now the sons of Mosiah were numbered among the unbelievers; and also one of the sons of Alma was numbered among them, he being called Alma, after his father; nevertheless, he became a very wicked and an idolatrous man.  And he was a man of many words, and he did speak much flattery to the people; therefore he led many of the people to do after the manner of iniquities.  And he became a great hinderment of the prosperity of the church of God; stealing away the hearts of the people; causing much dissension among the people; giving a chance for the enemy of God to exercise his power over them.  [And he] was going about to destroy the church of God, for he did go about secretly with the sons of Mosiah seeking to destroy the church, and to lead astray the people of the Lord, contrary to the commands of God, or even the king... *

So the sons of Mosiah hung out with Alma and they were pretty much breaking the law and trying to destroy the church.  That's all, y'know- not that big of a deal...  But you see, Alma's dad was the Prophet and he prayed that Heavenly Father would help Alma and his friends turn their lives around.  What happens next is a pretty awesome story that I really couldn't do justice to try and sum up.

...as they were going about rebelling against God, behold, the angel of Lord appeared unto them... [and said]: Behold, the Lord hath heard the prayers of his speople, and also the prayers of his servant, Alma, who is thy father; for he has prayed with much faith concerning thee that thou mightest be brought to the knowledge of the truth; therefore, for this purpose have I come to convince thee of the power and authority of God.... And now behold, can ye dispute the power of God?... Now I say unto thee: Go, and remember the captivity of thy fathers... and remember how great things he has done for them; for they were in bondage and he has delivered them.  And now I say unto thee... go thy way, and seek to destroy the church no more...  And now Alma and those that were with him fell again to the earth, for great was their astonishment; for with their own eyes they had beheld an angel of the Lord; and his voice was as thunder, which shook the earth; and they knew that there was nothing save the power of God that could shake the earth and cause it to tremble as though it would part asunder.

Okay, so they were visited and called to repentance by an angel.  Did it work?

And now the astonishment of Alma was so great that he became dumb, that he could not open his mouth; yea, and he became weak, even that he could not move his hands; therefore was taken by those that were with him, and carried helpless, even until he was laid before his father.... and it came to pass after they had fasted and prayed for the space of two days and two nights, the limbs of Alma received their strength, and he stood up and began to speak unto them, bidding them to be of good comfort:
For, said he, I have repented of my sins, and have been redeemed of the Lord; behold I am born of the Spirit.  And the Lord said unto me: Marvel not that all mankind, yea, men and women, all nations, kindreds, tongues and people, must be born again; yea, born of God, changed from their carnal and fallen state, to a state of righteousness, being redeemed of God, becoming his sons and daughters; and thus they become new creatures; and unless this be the case, they must be cast off; and this I know because I was like to be cast off.  Nevertheless, after wading through much tribulation, repenting night unto death, the Lord in mercy hath seen fit to snatch me out of an everlasting burning, and I am born of God.  My soul hath been redeemed from the gall of bitterness and bonds of iniquity.  I was in the darkest abyss; but now I behold the marvelous light of God.  My soul was racked with eternal torment; but I am snatched, and my soul is pained no more.  I rejected my Redeemer, and denied that which had been spoken of by our fathers; but now that they may foresee that he will come, and that he remembered every creature of his creating, he will make himself manifest unto all....                     

So Alma went through a big fat repentance process.  What became of him and the sons of Mosiah?

And now it came to pass that Alma began from this time forward to teach the people, and those who were with Alma at the time the angel appeared unto them, traveling round about through all the land, publishing to all the people the things which they had heard and seen, and preaching the word of God in much tribulation, being greatly persecuted by those who were unbelievers, being smitten by many of them.  But nothwithstanding all this, they did impart much consolation to the church, confirming their faith, and exhorting them with long-suffering and much travail to keep the commandments of God.
And four of them were the sons of Mosiah; and their names were Ammon, and Aaron, and Omner, and Himni.... And they traveled throughout all the land of Zarahemla, and among all the people who were under the reign of king Mosiah, zealously striving to repair all the injuries which they had done to the church, confessing all their sins, and publishing all the things which they had seen, and explaining the prophecies and the scriptures to all who desired to hear them.  And thus they were instruments in the hands of God in bringing many to the knowledge of the truth, yea, to the knowledge of their Redeemer.
And how blessed are they!  For they did publish peace; they did publish good tidings of good; and they did declare unto the people that the Lord reigneth.                          

copyright 2011 CSager Photography

They became men of the highest calibre.  These men went from being the "very vilest of sinners" and "like to be cast off" to setting the standard of righteousness against which men in future generations would be judged.    This strikes me.  Christ snatched them from everlasting burning and redeemed them!  What does it mean to be redeemed?  It means to be bought back.  They had, with their sins, sold themselves to Satan and Christ brought them back from the darkest abyss to behold the marvelous light of God.  Alma says that his soul was "racked with eternal torment" but after he accepted Christ and the power of the Atonement into his life, Alma's "soul [was] pained no more".

This is one of the greatest stories of hope I can think of.  No matter what we have done, we can always repent. It is never too late.

The discouraging idea that a mistake (or even a series of them) makes it everlastingly too late, does not come from the Lord. He has said that if we will repent, not only will He forgive us our transgressions, but He will forget them and remember our sins no more. … Repentance is like soap; it can wash sin away. Ground-in dirt may take the strong detergent of discipline to get the stains out, but out they will come.  -Boyd K. Packer

Do not only hope to be forgiven of your sins- to have them washed away.  Hope to among the noble and great ones of this generation.  Hope to be like Alma and the sons of Mosiah, men so great they set a precedent of virtue and goodness which influenced and guided men to greatness for generations to come.

Additional Reading
"God Will Forgive" an excerpt from The Miracle of Forgiveness by the excellent Spencer W. Kimball
"Alma, Son of Alma" {the lessons we learn from his life give us hope...} by Jeffrey R. Holland
*The story of Alma, Ammon, Aaron, Omner, and Himni comes from the twenty-seventh chapter of the book of Mosiah
"Amazed at the Love Jesus Offers Me"  also by Elder Holland