Okay, so I can't sleep. Again.
Do I feel anxious? Maybe that's part of it... the other part is the stinkin' migraine that new drug: Zomig, isn't helping. Ugh. And I'm planning on getting up an extra hour early just to see if giving myself that extra time in the morning will help me to be able to go to seminary.
I hear that seminary people are starting to talk about me. Questioning- why is it conveniently worse in the morning? Is she really sick?
That kind of hurts, but I'm working on just letting it hurt, and not letting it make me mad. People doubting my health problems really can make me mad because it puts into question my character. I'm nowhere near perfect, but making myself out to be ill just so I don't have to do as much is most definately not one of my character flaws. It's not like I enjoy being sick. It sucks. I love being busy. I love people. Being sick doesn't allow me to be busy, or to see people. I know that a lot of people think it would be nice to not have to go to school, seminary, or church, but I'm weird. I like school, seminary, and church. I miss them!
So when people question how sick I am and if I use it as an excuse to slack off, it really frustrates me and I have to realize that they must not know me at all.
All the more reason to treasure the people that know the truth.
I think I might go take a sleeping pill. I never have before, but I really want to go to sleep.
I have a semi-full day tomorrow- I actually have to leave the house. I'm excited about this- seeing people, being elsewhere, but it also makes me nervous because I don't know how much it will affect my health.
That's all for tonight. I'll just hope tomorrow goes well and leave off worrying about things until then. "Sufficient is the evil thereof..."
Matt. 6: 34 Take therefore no thought for the morrow: for the morrow shall take athought for the things of itself. Sufficient unto the day is the evil thereof.
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